Theme Parks have a lot to answer for.

When I was a wee lad, my greatest dream was to go to Disneyland. For me, it represented a dreamlike place where every moment was an adventure. A paradise where each impoverished Uni student in an overheated synthetic fibre suit represented another opportunity to engage in acts of petty violence. It was also a point of contention between my sisters and I, who had of course been to Disneyland, while I was treated to the wonders of the rural town of Bega.

But of course, when I did finally get to the promised land it was a pale imitiation of my dreams. Space Mountain was not as high as I had pictured, the tea cups didn´t spin nearly quickly enough and Mickey Mouse was not as accepting of being crashed tackled from behind as I had hoped. Sure, it was fun - but it was fun in the way a game of Catch ´n´Kiss in the primary school yard is fun - when you really got down to it, it just wasn´t real. (And they didn´t respect you in the morning, either)

San Pedro de Atacama is like Disneyland. It is full of bright bangs, exciting rides and people in costume, but something about it just doesn´t ring true. I have seen Geysers, careered across the desert and swam in pools of boiling water, but dig a bit below the surface and you find a bit of a void. The entire town exists solely for the benefit of visiters. And just like your every other theme park, its streets are full of obnoxious, non-compromising tourists in silly hats. (a group which includes myself, I loathe to admit)

These tourists come in many shades - everyone knows the usual groupings of ´Culture Vultures´, ´Beach Bums´and ´Adrenilin Junkies´- but to these well known fraternities, I would like to add one of my own.

Bear with me now, because this is going to take a while.

This new group is that of the Pretentious Travellers. This term is a bit unwieldy so I am going to shorten this to the PT´s. But hang on a bit, we are in Chile, where they speak Spanish and in Spanish it is usual to put the adjective before the noun, so they would have to be the Travellers Pretentious. This means of course that I get to call them the TPs or the ´Teepees´. And this makes me happy.

Teepee´s are characterised by the following criteria:

i) they have usually been travelling for less than 3 months.
ii) an attitude that states if it is not on a tour or within 3 blocks of the hostel, then it is not worth going to.
iii) An compulsion that requires them to explain to you how incredible their experiences have been and how when it all gets down to it, you have to focus on the important things in life, don´t you?, and money is just dross isn´t it?, and y´know I hope that when I get home I will be able to show my friends how silly they are been, because, y´know life isn´t your job right, because there are people out here who have nothing right? And it´s like, you have to, y´know get everything in perspective. Because otherwise, it´s just like, now I understand what it is all about now. Y´know?

I had the pleasure of running into two spectacular specimens of the Teepee genus just last night. And boy, did they share their revelations. Apparently, the guy (who was a psychologist - which is neither here nor there) is going home to raise orphans. He declared this just before he proceeded to heap bile upon the waiter, because the pub didn´t have his preferred brand of Malboro Lights.

But is always entertaining. Y´know, when it comes down to it, this place makes Disneyland look like a frick´n country fair.

Rock and Roll.

Paddy.