Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Dreams can come true...

... look at me babe I´m living proof.

Oh yeah!

Indeed, the most cherished desire of anyone´s dark little heart can be brought to fruitition! This normally occurs through the mechanism of dumb luck. (Smart luck is of course, much rarer).

What in the name of all that is holy am I talking about? Patience, my pretties, patience. All in good time.

Here is the low-down

I now am happily ensconched as the local gringo in the lovely hamlet of Magdelena del Cao. Happily, but perhaps not comfortably. You see, running water is a but a far off vista, and hot water, well, let´s just say that Peru will have an asian lesbian cyborg president before I get a nice steamy shower. No, I get to shower with a cold (and I mean cooooold) bucket of water. And so it is that The Madge (as Magdelena del Cao will henceforth be known)is awoken early each morning to the echoes of my girlish screams . What´s more the electricity is as unreliable as a train to Pennant Hills.

I am here with a lovely French girl by the name of Jessica and the both of us are bringing the joys of English to the good people of the Madge. We are very busy. Classes for ninos, adolescentes, adultos and senoras each day keeps us too busy to give ourself more than a cursory scratch. We also do lessons in the local primary and secondary schools. I am quite enjoying the teaching experience - although I think I am more suited to adult education than the kiddy kind. I am too reliant on a little thing called logic which does not seem to apply to the under 10s. Still, it has provided me with a good opportunity to revisit some of the classics - ´What´s the time Mr Wolf?´(which for some reason has become ´What´s the time Mr Dinosaur?´and it is no longer ´Dinner-time!´ oh no, it is ´DINOSAUR!´). Other classics like ´The Hokey Pokey´, ´If you´re happy and you know it´ and ´Heads and Shoulders Knees and Toes´ have also had a long awaited re-release. Too much fun.

But the best thing is, the really fun thing is, that we are absolute celebrities. We cannot walk through the street without attracting a Pied Piper of Hamilenesque train of locals staring at our every move and hanging on our every word. Any event, be it birthday, anniversary, marriage or desexing cannot take place with out the two pet foreigners being dragged in for a photo opportunity.

But here is the punch-line, the cherished dream referred to oh so long ago at the beginning of this entry. Later this month the Madge has its founding celebrations. Three days and nights of partying drinking and craziness await us with talent comps, music battles, groups marriages (I kid you not!) and all sorts of fun things. Among these celebrations there is the highlight-

Miss Magdelena del Cao.

And I am to be the Judge in Chief!

Oh yes, despite my reservations about the intrinscically sexist nature of such competitions, I have had to... oh with such a heavy heart, accept this honoured position.

Rock and Roll

Paddy.

6 comments:

Clare said...

Then your life will be complete. Whatever will you aim for after that?
Sounds like a laugh - have fun.

Anonymous said...

I'm so proud

Simon

Jess (fushmush) said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Jess (fushmush) said...

It's a scholarship program, right?

Anonymous said...

Master Patrick,

What are the criteria for Miss Magdalena del Cao? Is there a swimsuit component? Is there a 'not sleeping with the judge component'? And do you realise that your ability to check out talent has now received international validation? (make sure you receive some sort of official acknoweldgment so that you have something to attacvh to your admission certificate)
Well done grasshopper.

Anonymous said...

What Fyfe said.